Fate
By Britney Baker
It was never a competition
Loving the same man in different season
Similar reasons
One combination, young and blinded
Dealing with life
And going out of their mind
The other still fresh but stable
Experiencing, maturing, aging
Overcoming obstacles, becoming more capable
You both decided to let it slip away
But I snatched it up, hoping for it to stay
You were there to help build him
You loved and shattered every feeling
You were his forever
You held onto every endeavor
Until fate became clever
You got the passion
I get the attraction
You got the violence
I get the silence
Your got the admiration
I get the dedication
It all comes to an end anyway
Moments transform to memories
We grew old, we grew captivated
Through our love, our trials
We faced it all together
We were so fascinated
Thank you for the best of him….the rest of him
Your poem has given me a lot to think about. It sounds like you’ve covered so much time in just a few short lines. I love it!
I remember hearing you read this at the SI orientation, and it really stuck with me! This poem could almost be told from two perspectives, if you wanted to play with that. Great work, Britney!
This causes me to pause and think about my own long-term relationship. Nicely done!
Bravo!! I love Mikayla’s idea of two perspectives — that could be a really cool take on format that I think would only enhance your subject! I also wonder if you could include a little more of the rhyming throughout? It could give it that nice “beat” that some poems with rhymes have. 🙂
Britney, this is such a lovely tribute to the people who shape the ones we love, for better or worse. My favorite line: “loving the same man in different seasons.”
What a lovely tribute to a long-term relationship. Being able to grow and change together like that over the years, learning to accept each new version of your partner… I can only hope to experience something similar some day! Thank you for sharing your love with us. 🙂
This is beautiful, Britney! You describe change, growth, and love so poignantly.
Painfully beautiful, Britney. The balance between the good and bad in love and loss creates a tension and a preciousness. My favorite lines were
“It was never a competition/
…
Moments transform to memories/
…
Thank you for the best of him….the rest of him”
(And yes, it would be cool if you decided to write another poem from the other perspective(s).)
Great work.
Brittney, I appreciate this poem first for its complexity in meeting complexity head on with complexity, but also because I think this poem bears the seed of other poems. Revisit this situation/these situations once twice three times more. you have more to say.